Wedding Jitters

"My sister is damn awesome!"

I wanted to start writing some updates about what I have been up to recently but didn't know where to start. I told my sis about it and she asked me to start with that. So not shy. But I still love her ;)

Since I mentioned that life has been slow moving since coming back here, I have been religiously reading bridal magazines, wedding planning books, bridal forums, sourcing for the best dinner location, looking at possible future love nest, researching for stuff online, house-hunting and just chilling (yes I still have time for that...haha).

I admit that when I started doing all of those things in the first week, I was close to going crazy. I barely had time to discuss anything with Nic cause he worked late and I didn't want to be the one making all decisions. We were constantly snapping at each other almost everytime we met up or spoke over the phone.

Then that one day, while I was showering, I was thinking a whole lot. I seriously didn't want to go through hell planning a wedding. I want to remember it, enjoy it, love every moment of it. Its something I want to look back at with good memories. So we talked about it, we calmed down each other's nerves, and I've not looked back since. Now we are back to our sweet selves and taking it one thing at a time. Its not worth arguing over these things. Its just an event. Being married is more important.

But its weird that I keep getting bad dreams about our wedding day. I had to walk on cushions covered with blankets to get to the altar, I was bleached blonde and had super bad hair day which my sister just clipped at two sides with some kiddy hairclip, my dad gave me away wearing a singlet and towel wrapped over his waist. Then I had another dream today about my make up artist showing up late plus she was taking her own sweet time doing the hair, daddy John asked the guest to start with dinner first, and by the time my guests had finish and started driving off in their cars, I haven't even finished with make up yet. It was horrible! Thank goodness this is all a dream~ *sweats*

Maybe too much wedding / bridal research....time to chill now *skips off to lunch*

Life back in KL...

Late last month, just before I moved back, everything was fast forward.

I barely had time to pack up and every day I had someone to meet and bid my goodbyes in Singapore. But the moment I came home to KL, almost everything came to a slow pace crawl. Just like the traffic jams here...

Nic is constantly working and very busy too. My close friends share similar working hours and have their own boyfriends and family to go home to. Thank goodness my mom's home with me. The only problem is, I constantly have to 'fight' for her attention with Charrise (the little girl she babysits).

Life is as chilling as anyone could ask for....but its really no fun when you've got no one to share it with...

Fast forward July

Life seems to be in a fast forward mode right now.

I blogged last month, about wanting to resign and packing up to move back to KL. Here I am, already free as a bird, packing to move back to KL. I actually thought I would write about how anxious or excited I felt about quitting or how much I'm gonna miss my job, and everything here in Singapore. But each time, the word and the feelings jumble into one big lump of nothing, and I end up just doing something else to not think about it.

Five days has passed since my last work day. I have calmly went to return my staff pass and all my other company's belongings the following day. I felt a little unsure, a little light headed, a little nervous, a little relief, a little of everything mixed up. It was kinda overwhelming. I came home, didn't feel like talking or doing anything at all. Went out to meet up with friends, and that is exactly what I have been doing for the past few days.

So it hasn't exactly settled in. The feeling that I am no longer employed.

Maybe it might take a few weeks...a month...or even a few months...

Right now, I just wanna enjoy the time I have...

Note: By the way, to those who has been following me on blogspot, thanx for the support. I seem to be having problems with posting a reply in the comments section. Appreciate all the encouragement out there.

The BIG decision

Since the proposal in February, there has been lots of fast moving moments, dodging the ball moments, new ideas in consideration moments, we'll handle that tomorrow moments, and now...one big leap moment.

I have been endlessly talking about leaving my job since the day that I started here in Singapore. And finally now I will be resigning to start again, back in Malaysia (but I haven't actually tender my resignation yet). Its almost unbelievable and came a little faster than I expected. But now that its finally sinking in, I can't wait for this new adventure to start.

Needless to say, I totally need a break now to start planning wedding stuff. Something that Nic and I have conveniently avoided cause we are working in Singapore. Its super tough to organize things from another country. I seriously don't know how Chee Eng and Mei See did it. Or maybe I wasn't putting enough effort and dedication in....yet...

The important thing for me now is to super organize my stuff over here so I can go back without worrying about things over here. I keep staring at my room and don't even know where I should start packing. *sigh*

I'm gonna miss a lot of things here...and people...and my personal space...

I sometimes wonder...

what goes on in each person's mind?

how can people be so different and still be friends?

why some people are only concern about their own thoughts and can care less about yours?

why do we expect certain things out of certain people?

why do I always have to care about details?

when can this uncomfortable feeling go away?

why do I even bother?

Arrghhh!! I'm being spammed!

Someone is seriously spamming my blog. I've got a comment on every single entry and its not even a comment. Its some freakishly long advertisement on bag selling!!! I don't do free advertisement! Plus, I can't seem to leave comments on my own blog entry anymore! How how how? Help~ Someone please tell me what I can do...

I'm melting~

Its so freaking hot today! I'm melting in my skin. I'm wearing the skimpiest of all clothing I have cause nobody's home. But it really ain't helping! My shorts are like sticking to my skin and my top is just so uncomfortable. I can't even lean into the sofa cause its so hot!

I shall think about something else to distract myself. Like a super cold drink and super cold salad, ice cream and penguins and igloo and the north pole...Who am I kidding! That is so not gonna work either.

I've even got my arms sticking out at my sides just so I get better ventilation at *ahem* certain areas. I should just switch on the air conditioning and chill down. But I'm thinking that is so bad for the environment..(why do I even think of things like that) Sigh~

I'll step into the shower to 'cool' myself now...